The Fashion of a Rose
by TheMadPen
Summary: Alice never believed herself to hold the same shallow values of the rest of the Liddell family. So why is it the first thing she notices is his fashion? Yet soon he teaches her that you can not judge anything by appearences... not even a rose.


**A/N: This random little pluff of fluff plopped into my head when I realized the first thing Alice noticed about Boris was his fashion sense. And while I personally find it -ridiculously- sexy, I thought that would make an interesting concentration point. Also, I really wanted to write some AlicexBoris. Oh, and this follows the manga up to the online English translation of all BorisxAlice (aka THE BEST) moments, plus thoughts and a bonus at the end. Anyways... I am very random with my divisions of paragraphs. I tend to experiment on groupings. If it bothers you, or you feel it detracts from the reading, please let me know!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own HnKnA, much to my displeasure. However, I do claim Boris. :3**

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Alice was never one for fashion.

But, growing up with her well-to-do family, it was an expectation to always look one's best. It was of utmost importance to maintain the spotless Liddell reputation... after all, with three daughters, Mr. and Mrs. Liddell were aware that in order to maintain their elite position in society, they must ensure their daughters marry no lower than their current social standing. Thus, all three Liddell sisters were always flawlessly dressed in the latest, classy trends. On Edith, and especially Lorina, this frilly fashion looked exquisite. But Alice always felt false somehow in her dressy get-ups, and emitted an uncomfortableness that was noticeable, and unbecoming. She was still a beautiful young lady, of course, but did not compare to her fashionable sisters.

Yet, classic dresses and fancy frills were all her closet consisted of, so wear them she did, and never thought to find her own style.

She did not think of herself as pretentious, yet apparently some of her upbringing was subconsciously engrained, because the first thing she noticed was his dress.

_'Punk fashion... he has cat ears, and a tail.'_

His dress made him look almost fierce at first. The chains and the tattoos... she wasn't sure what to think. At first he seemed so serious as he began telling her about Blood and the amusement park owner's feud. He leaned in close to her, eyes slitted and yellow, and though the dark topic scared her, Alice was entranced by his eyes.  
"Mary Gowland," He whispered, his eyes boring into her own.  
"Mary... Gowland?" She asked, breathlessly.  
"Yup," He grinned, and suddenly she saw this whole new side to him, a goofy, kind, funny side. "The Old Man's name is Mary Gowland."

He made her laugh, this wonderland cat. He wasn't anything like the boys at home, who were as stuffy and formal as the suits they wore. He was as different as they came, with his purple hair and fluffy boa, his tattoos, chains, and bare midriff.

And she decided then that he was alright.

When he came again with Dee and Dum, it was like they were already friends. And somehow, they were. When he told Julius they were "borrowing her", she didn't feel near as worried as she let on. She was actually kind of excited.  
At the amusement park, after getting over the surprising normalcy of it, Alice was struck by the fashion of the employees. They were so eccentric looking, she was put off. Suddenly, she realized what she was doing, and her thoughts plagued her. Was she really as shallow as her parents? Did she honestly care that much about appearance. Her hypocrisy nagged at her. But she was saved from her quiet torment by a louder, scratchier outside force. Gowland's music was horribly attrocious, to put it mildly. As her head began throbbing, she couldn't stand it any longer and shouted; "Just stop, Mary Gowland!"  
And Gowland did stop... turning to him threateningly, "Merry-Go-Round" menacingly growled the cat boy's name. And though he took this in stride, Alice worried. She didn't want to get him in trouble, he was... her friend. Her first real, non-parental enforced male friend. And she didn't want anything to happen to him.

After the tea party, the next time she saw him, he literally "dropped" in on her. He was badly wounded, and she was scared to see him like this. Automatically, she offered to treat his cuts. His callousness toward himself scared her, and when she told him not to make her worry, she was surprised by his reaction.

"Worry...? You're worried about me?" He asked, disbelieve etched on every feature. And she was. She worried about this strangely dressed cat, and when he thanked her with that big, beautiful smile of his, she didn't even know what to say. When he nonchalantly mentioned his frequent injuries, the intensity of her distress surprised even her. He told her it was a game, and she was so worried, her reaction came across as anger;  
"That's not playing! Fighting like that... what if you died?" She asked, not able to look him in the face.  
"Nothing," His words chilled her. "Are you worried about that, too?"  
She and he both tried to explain what was "normal", but then, their worlds were too different. You could just _look_ at them and see that. Him with his punk fashion, now bandaged up, and her in her classic dress and bow. She frowned at herself, and yet she found once again the first thing that came to mind to describe her "normal" was fashion.  
"First off, there aren't guys who grow animal ears. There may be some who put them on for fun, but they are _not_ normal. Besides, anyone with animal ears frustrates me..." She found herself fuming, thinking of Peter.  
"Alice... do you hate me?" When he looked at her like that, she couldn't help but melt.  
"What... no, I don't hate you!" She answered quickly and truthfully, then stopped herself. She didn't get close to people, it wasn't a good idea. "It's just your cat ears are a bit of a nuisance." She found herself adding. She was lying, and she hated herself for it.

As he gloomily claimed he couldn't help it, she kicked herself internally. Just because she vowed never to love again did not mean she needed to be mean to her friends.  
Hoping to make him feel better, she tried to tell him another way her world was normal... that they don't use guns.  
"I've never touched one, much less used one before. Nor do I want to." She said, then cringed again. Couldn't she say _anything_ without bringing in her prim upbringing? People of course used guns to hunt, or for sport... it was just not something a "proper" English girl would do.

But he, of course, couldn't know this. He just grinned, and said "I see," while his eyes twinkled mischievously. Alice was confused until he suddenly whipped out a gun, attached by a long, heavy chain to his collar.

"This is my favorite gun... wanna hold it?" He asked holding it out to her.

Although Alice didn't know why, she was afraid. She was Alice _Liddell_ and shouldn't be holding a gun. So she protested and Boris insisted and suddenly...  
His arms were wrapped around her body and his hands were around hers, keeping her hands steady around the gun. She froze.

"That's it, like this," He said, leaning in until his face was almost touching hers from the side. "Wanna try shooting it?" He asked quietly, his lips brushing against her ear.  
"No," she breathed, startled by his closeness. But this time she knew what she said was her own opinion, and not something cultivated by her family. She told him that she was afraid she may accidentally hit someone, and she didn't want that on her conscious.  
"You don't need to worry," He told her, looking at her strangely. Then he got up, and suddenly he tapped her chest, making her heart skip a beat. "Your heart may not be fixable if it breaks, but ours are different. They're replaceable. Endless amounts of replacements."

Alice thought of Julius and his job. She finally understood. Struggling to hold back her emotion she asked in a quiet, controlled voice; "Is that why... you are so reckless?"

"There's always a substitute. There's no problems, even if I die," He answered simply.

And, replaceable heart or not, Alice felt as if her own heart had been cleaved in two. She thought she knew what a broken heart felt like, but nothing, _nothing_ could compare to the agony she felt knowing that he simply didn't care. It was one thing to love someone and for them not to love you back. It was another for them not to even love themselves enough to care if they lived or died.  
Suddenly, more than anything in the world, she wanted him to _care_. To understand, to feel her pain. So she stomped down hard on his foot, and yanked his tail.

"That hurts Alice!"  
"Ow ow ... not my tail..."

She pulled, harder.

"Ahhhhhhhh~!"

Finally he broke away and fell to the ground, while Alice huffed. "Alice," he turned to her, tears of pain still in his eyes. "Why are you mad?"  
She couldn't tell him she wasn't angry, she was hurt, even more than he was. So she kept her frown. "What do you mean by 'substitute'?" She looked down, unable to meet his gaze. "They might be fixable but... that doesn't mean you should treat life so carelessly. Besides, even if you cam back to life, it won't be _you_ anymore, right?"

"I guess," He sat up, still not understanding.

Suddenly, Alice couldn't stand it anymore and snapped. She looked at him, and cried out, "That means even if your clock is fixed I won't ever see you again!" She knelt down in front of him, feeling exhausted. "It think... that's sad..."

"I see..." He said, looking thoughtful. "That's right. If I become someone else, I won't be able to see Alice anymore... I guess... I wouldn't like that."

She was struck again my his clothes. They made him look so rough, and yet... this was the sweetest, most sincere guy Alice had ever met. Even though his words made her feel dizzy, she felt inclined to ask, "Aren't there more? Others you'd want to see?"

"Hmm..." He looked up, thinking. "No."  
"What?" She asked, feeling dazed.  
"You're the only one I've felt this way for," He said, smiling at her. She felt her cheeks growing warm and her heart sped up. "You're the only one who worries about me."  
"Re... really?" Was all she could manage to choke out.  
"Yup." He was so carefree, and innocent. Alice couldn't help but admit (just to herself) that she felt attached. "I wouldn't like it if I couldn't see you anymore. I'll try not to die from now on." He said, looking at her mischievously, and winking.  
"Alright," she found herself smiling, and felt that he was the only one that could make her feel this comfortable. She wasn't afraid to be herself while she was around him.

Sometimes, though, she still got caught up in the old game. The game of her other life, where status and respectability mattered. And Blood was the typical player of that game. So even though she _wasn't _anything like her family, and she didn't believe in all that stuff, she still found herself subconsciously drawn to him. He dressed exquisitely, and his manners were those of a proper gentleman. Not to mention he looked exactly like her ex - the man she was supposed to marry, in the logical sequence of her parents' and societies' fashion-plated events. Yet, Alice was not of the right mold. She felt that she didn't belong, and therefore everyone began to treat her as such. She should have known better than to show her true character to Blood... what was she expecting? Acceptance? So when he nearly killed her, she shouldn't have been surprised. And then telling him about her love life? How could she not have expected more pain? She knew this was just society coming back to bite her again, and her tears were nothing more than silly wishes.

When she saw him with the Bloody Twins, she tried to hide her pain away, just as was expected of her at home. Yet this made her distant, and while the twins asked her if she was heading back to the clock tower, all she could really think of was Vivaldi and Blood in the rose garden. They were beautiful and elegant... just like Lorina, and Alice's ex. Alice felt as if the roses were just the symbols of these fashionable people. And no matter how hard she tried to belong in that society, she would only end up pricking herself on the thorns.

Suddenly, she was startled from her morose thoughts by a question.

"Alice," He said, leaning down to look into her eyes. "I have two of a certain flower, but when held together, the petals fall off, what flower is it?"  
Alice was still fixated on the roses, and tried to clear her head. "The petals fall just from holding it? It must be a weak flower." _A reject flower,_ she thought bitterly. _Just like me.  
_**"Wrong."** He said decisively, and Alice felt like he was correcting more than just her spoken words. "The answer is... this." He said, holding up...  
"A rose...?" Alice couldn't believe her eyes. "A rose isn't that feeble." _A rose is perfect...  
_"No, not that," He smiled at her, and held up two roses. "A bara... and a bara... so barabara! It fell apart!"  
"...pfft." She started to giggle, and all of a sudden the world was a brighter place. "Ahaha ~ what is that? It's just a riddle."  
"I like riddles," He grinned at her.

She had never been one for riddles, but she liked this one. Because it was especially for her, to make her laugh. But then, he said it, after all, and she was beginning to realize that she would like anything he did.

But he was more than just a goofy. He was her protector as well. It was he who found her, slumped on the ground, covered in blood, surrounded by dead faceless and lost in thought. He was the one who checked to make sure she was okay. And, even when her body was clearly fine, it was he who noticed her pain inside. He took her to the amusement park, and told her "Not to worry... let's just have fun!" And she did have fun... even on the Coffee Cup Jet Coaster, a ride she was sure she would never leave alive, her last thought before she last consciousness was thankfulness, that she was able to spend her last day by him.

"Ce..."

"Lice..."

"Alice." She opened her eyes, and starred into his relieved face and Gowland's sheepish one. She was still trying to fully wake up, and did not pay much attention to Gowland's rambling apology until he said, "You know there are alot of people who love roller coasters, right? I just thought I'd entertain young couples on dates..."  
"Couples on dates!" His words and Alice's were perfectly in synch, and they hid their blushes under false anger.

Under the onslaught of congratulations and teasing, he finally spit out, "I just wanted to cheer Alice up since she didn't look so great!"

"I didn't realize..." Alice was struck by the fact that he really cared. _Just like that riddle from the other day... _She thought. "Thanks. I feel better now." She told him, smiling.  
"...hehe." He grinned at her, and they forgot to be embarrassed, despite the adoring looks they got from Gowland and the employees.

Alice forgot all uncomfortable things when she was with him.

Not to say that she forgot _how_ to be embarrassed. When she came in wearing the stupid ears and gloves, she was mortified by Julius' reaction.  
"See? I told you!" She yelled, shaking him. "Julius is completely creeped out!"  
"Oh come on now, watch-maker! Alice is dressed so cutely." When he said this, Alice was no longer embarrassed by Julius... no, the blush that was spreading on her cheeks was completely from him. Trying to hide this, she quickly kicked him out of the tower.

She couldn't know. It wasn't her fault, of course, there was no way she could have known that he would run into Ace, who was in a particularly conflicted mood. But he did. And everything thing would have been fine, except... he cared about Alice. And he worried about her seeing Ace like this, covered in blood. She was first on his thoughts and he would protect her, even when she wasn't there. He worried about her, he was beginning to understand how she felt about death.  
So when he realized it was Ace who murdered all those faceless, _in front of her_, and then just _**left**_ her there, he lost it. He confronted Ace, who was less then apologetic. In fact, he was only concerned with how much people cared for the outsider.

"I know," Ace said, smiling. "I think I'll kill Alice."

He saw red, and he shot at Ace, without hesitation. But he missed... purposely.

Ace teased him, asking, "Tired of being Alice's knight already?"

"Alice would... be sad if you died," He said, because he knew the words were true, even if they hurt him. "She said that if I died a replacement would appear and that would still not be 'me'... I think it's the same for everyone she meets."

He hadn't realized this before, but he did now, and it galled him. He knew then that he wanted to be something more to Alice, someone different. And even if she didn't feel any differently toward him, he would do as Ace suggested. He would be her knight.

When he finally made it to Alice, he was barely able to whisper his apology for getting himself so hurt. He mustered up just enough energy to warn her; "You can't go outside...! It's dangerous. If you encounter the knight of hearts..." Here, however, his strength gave out, and he slipped into darkness.

Now it was Alice's turn to sit and worry. There was of course, the fear that Ace would find her. But, even worse was the fear that Boris wouldn't recover. It nagged at her, and as she sat, waiting for Julius to return, this was the thought that wound 'round and 'round her head. She realized at that moment that she couldn't live without his carefree grin, his silly jokes and riddles, his protection, his understand... she couldn't live without him. Because she-  
Ace entered the room, and Alice stood to meet him. Although Ace smiled, Alice remained deathly serious. "...Ace. Did you do this to Boris...?"

"Yup," Ace was unapologetic, and as innocent looking as ever, but the blood on his clothes, as well as his words, betrayed him. "He got mad when I said 'Maybe I'll kill Alice. But I didn't understand what he wanted to do after that." He looked thoughtful. "He said that if he killed me, you would be upset. So Mr. Kitty put his gun down for that reason. But to put his gun down for that... I was kinda surprised and swung at him."

Alice was floored. He was hurt because of what she said? Just because of her other world ideas? It was her fault he was like this? Though this knowledge hurt, she was hardly surprised. Of course, she would be the 'cause of all these problems. She was such a useless person...

"But he's not the only weird one," Ace's words snapped her back to the present. "Everyone who has met you has changed. Peter, the Hatter, and even Julius. They've all changed since you arrived. I said the same thing but... I thought I could change too if I stayed by you. But I'm the same as always and I've become more loss. Alice..." Ace looked at her, and though he smiled, his eyes had lost all hope. "Do you think I can change?"  
"Ace," Alice asked in response, uncertainly. "Do you want to change?"

And as Ace explained the uselessness of himself, how he was merely a pawn in a game he never wanted to play, Alice felt that she understood. And just as she understood that Ace really wasn't going to kill her, she now knew that she was not just a pawn in her parents' game. She was here, in Wonderland, and she was loved by amazing people. And... she loved them, too.  
Even though she told Ace she didn't understand him, in a sense, she did. She could emphasize with the pain he felt, and she knew that he was better that the part he played. So when she told him "...I guess our paths just won't cross," she meant that she wouldn't meet this dark side of Ace. "To me Ace is the one who wanders and ends up lost. But you always look like you're having fun. Isn't that enough?"

And Alice decided, for herself, it was enough. She isn't exactly the person she thought she would be, and she certainly wasn't the person that her parents expected her to be. But she was herself. Not only that, but she had found the person who she could be herself with, without fear, and who would always be himself.

"Alice?"

She turned just in time to see him spring from the bed in order to rush at Ace, only to fall to his knees. "Ugh... ow."  
"You have a horrible wound! You can't move yet!" Alice tried to settle him back down, to no avail.  
"But Alice," He groaned, weakly. "He's trying to kill you... So I..."

And though Ace and Alice both tried to convince him that this was no longer the case, he was still doubtful... until Ace mentioned listening to Alice's heartbeat. Especially when Ace mentioned that it was very easy to hear when he pressed his ear against her chest. So when Alice wielded the scissors against Ace, she was not expecting the hand from below.

"That's no fair..." He said, before pulling Alice down to the ground and climbing on top of her, pinning her beneath him. "Alice let me listen to your heart, too." He said, staring into her eyes intently.

And though she was sure he could hear it from where he was, it was beating so loudly, he didn't get the chance to listen the "good way" (according to him and Ace) because Peter White came in, and quickly separated the men from his beloved Alice.  
And even though she discovered his health in a rather... awkward way, Alice was happy to see him back to his usual self.

The next time they were together, they were sitting just outside of the amusement park, enjoying the shade of trees and the cold deliciousness of two very large ice-cream cones. Sneaking a look over at him, Alice was once again struck by his creative look. From the earrings and midriff-exposing shirt, to the cat ears and tail, he was nothing like... well, anyone she had ever known before. And she loved him for it. Looking down at her own frilly clothes, she sighed quietly, still regretting that she never found her own style, separate from her Liddell name. She was staring absentmindedly now, until she suddenly noticed his socks. They were boldly striped she noticed... _just like hers. _The only part of her outfit which she had picked out herself, despite her parents' disapproval and her sisters' sighs.

She started laughing and leaned over to hug him. He was surprised, but couldn't help but laugh and hug her back.

"Alice...? He asked, when he was able to catch his breath.

"Nothing..." She smiled against his chest and looked down at their beautiful, beautiful socks. "Nothing at all, Boris Airay."

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**Do please review, I would love some feedback, and I would love to look up your stories, too!  
****(Was that a bribe? Why, yes, yes it was...)**


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